my parents failed to raise me to become an olympian, i’m so disappointed in them
I used to tell my mom this all the time and she was like “so you wanted me to put insane pressure on you and make you miserable?” Duh, mom. That’s good parenting 101.
I love sunglasses, am I looking at that tree? Am I staring at your dick? Who knows!
i swear it would be easier to explain if someone looked over my shoulder and saw me watching porn than to explain some of the posts on my damn dashboard…this being one of them
That time you confused a lesson for a soulmate.
Longer than 30 words, but I’m making an exception. I absolutely love this.
Judi Dench is my favorite M.
Always reblog M sass.
John Stewart and Aubrey Plaza together in the same place conversing. It was an excellent birthday present, thank you Comedy Central.
I don’t know why all the other boys haven’t got the message yet, I only love one man. Everyone else quite literally disgusts me(romantically speaking). So you can all maybe not send me weird messages on my birthday, ffs, I don’t even know you.
No, Dalton’s friends really have no sense of irony. One of his friends just posted a status about how annoying it is when people post passive aggressive statuses about other people instead of saying it to their face. I’m going to go out on a limb and assume that she didn’t send a private message to all the people she is passive aggressively calling out in that status, but ok, she did say it is sometimes acceptable(this is not, however, her first passive aggressive status). But then it turns into a discussion about how terrible social media is and how it’s ruining America. Where is this wonderful sharing of ideas taking place? On Facebook, of course.
I mean, she’s a pretty cool girl but she has such a distinct lack of self-awareness and that’s one flaw that really gets under my skin. I’ll forgive a lot if you say “yeah, I’m doing this and I know that it’s bad/silly/etc. but I’m doing it anyway”. Can’t deal with people who don’t know or aren’t honest about their actions/intentions.
I just feel like all throughout high school and college I was surrounded by thoughtful, intelligent, and attractive young women, did they just not exist at Dalton’s high school, other than Hope? Did he find the one intelligent and pretty girl, get her to date him, and then nosedive that plane straight into the ground for someone who writes passive aggressive Facebook stasuses about people who make passive aggressive Facebook statuses? What a moron.
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